“We walk the earth with our eyes turned skyward, for there we have been so we long to return.”

Leonardo Da Vinci

For as long as I can remember, whenever I was in pain or upset I would cry out, “I want to go home”. I could be sitting in my bedroom in the house I grew up in, and yet I longed for a sense of familiarity, belonging and union with something greater than myself that I knew existed but couldn’t remember where. It wasn’t until much later that I realised I was longing for a place that wasn’t of this earth.

“The fact that we feel homesick for a place we’ve never been, is proof that our True home must be in heaven.” 

CS Lewis

Across all faiths is this underlying idea that we are not just our physical bodies, we are in fact spiritual beings having a human experience. And part of what we’re doing here is trying to reach enlightenment by experiencing, realising and living as the Soul while still in the body. We transcend the physical in order to access the Truth of who we really are. 

“Spiritual yearning is homesickness of the Soul”

Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati

We incarnate from the metaphysical world of the infinite into the physical world of the relative in order to experience who we really are, in the face of that which we’re not. In our true home in Heaven, we exist in a constant state of Love. Love is all that is. Yet in order to experience the fullness of that Love (which we long to do), we have to go somewhere where the opposite exists. It’s like living your whole life in a tropical paradise that’s a balmy 30 degrees every day. You don’t actually know how warm it is until you visit somewhere with snow. When you leave your island home and find yourself in the cold, you suddenly have a reference point by which to measure the temperature. 

At the highest level, God seeks expansion through experience. If God is the alpha and the omega, the beginning and the end (All That Is), we are the manifestations of His/Her desire to experience what He/She already knows. We are enacting Source’s journey back to Love. At the Soul level, each of us is here to experience whatever our Soul wants to know about itself. For example, I might know that I am unconditionally forgiving, yet how could I experience that unless I had someone to forgive? My Soul knows that she is pure Light and radiant Truth, yet it is only in the face of darkness that she can see how bright she really shines.

In order to have the full experience, we had to forget the Love and beauty of the realm from which we came, so we adopt what Neale Donald Walsch calls, “the amnesia of the Divine.”

We wander around with a God-shaped hole in our heart, desperately hoping to catch even a glimpse of the peace, joy and love our Soul knows it is capable of experiencing in this lifetime. We are invested in forgetfulness, buying into the illusion without remembering why we created it. Unsure where to look, most of us settle for cheap imitations; the rush of orgasm, the thrill of an affair, the temporary euphoria of substance-induced highs. We become addicted to the imitations, unaware that the Source of all joy, wisdom and understanding is already buried deep within us. It’s like scavenging outside for crumbs when there’s a feast waiting at home.

And that’s what it means to ‘wake up’, to be born again, to receive the gift of salvation; to be free from the illusion that this is all there is, to experience that which we already know. It’s both the purpose and meaning of our lives, it’s who we are and why we’re here. Life is therefore not a process of learning anything, but of remembering what we already know.

The ‘fall’ of Adam and Eve wasn’t about temptation or sin, it’s a metaphor for the desire to experience duality. When Eve ate from the tree of knowledge of Good and Evil, she didn’t cause the downfall of mankind, she began the greatest journey any of us has ever embarked upon.

I spent so many years searching for the sense of security, peace and connection that I knew was my birthright, and the only experience that has ever come close is what I feel in when I’m in the presence of God, when my hands are outstretched, my heart is open and my voice is crying out for Him. I can taste the sweetness that nothing of this world – not the sweetest food, the best orgasm or the shiniest medal – could ever rival, I feel a peace that no house, car or relationship has ever been able to provide, and I catch a glimpse of Who I Really Am – a being so Divine, so Holy, so Pure and so innocent that I hardly recognise her as myself. 

I know you feel it to. The longing, the restlessness, the hunger. You’ve searched for it in all the wrong places and it’s lead you to nothing but dark paths and dead ends. Now it’s time to come home. To Yourself, to your Truth, to the place inside you that remembers what it’s like to be infinite.

“My soul is from elsewhere, I’m sure of that, and I intend to end up there.” 

– Rumi 


All my love,

Jae x 

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